A very telling factor as to whether or now you’ll get back together is the reason that broke you up in the first place. Do you know why you split up? Many relationships begin to deteriorate over time, but often, partners will fail to notice anything is wrong, especially if the other person isn’t vocal about it. This is the best place to start.

What was it about the relationship that didn’t work or needs to be fixed? Who was unhappy or unsatisfied? Often times you can salvage a dwindling relationship with better communication, compromise, understanding and plenty of honesty.

One common reason relationships end is infidelity and your approach will different depending on which of you was unfaithful.

If you were the transgressor, take some time to figure out what it was you were after while you were being unfaithful. Is monogamy really for you? If you decide that your moment of cheating was a fluke, realize that you’ve already broken her trust and there is really no going back from that point. What this means is that you must dedicate yourself to rebuilding this trust and this may take time. Your relationship will not return to the way things were before you cheated and in fact may change significantly to be either better or worse. Do not make this decision lightheartedly.

Another issue to consider is that people who cheat tend to become suspicious that the partner they cheated on is going to cheat on them. This is a sign of instability within yourself. Consider counseling or couples counseling.

If she was the one who was unfaithful, she must go through the same process. Her response to those questions will dictate a lot. If this is her first offense and you believe her apology is sincere, trying to move past her infidelity will take some time and much work on her part. But be warned, there is only one chance for her to redeem herself. Serial cheaters are to be avoided at all costs.

Another major concern in many relationships is financial troubles. Living together can make this a central issue very quickly, especially if there are wide gaps in pay discrepancies between partners. This must be resolved depending on the lifestyles both people lead. Remember that someone can only contribute according to ability and each partner deserves to receive according to their need.

This kind of thinking is helpful in other aspects of love. Are all sexual, physical, intellectual and emotional needs being met? Communication is the key to ensure that all aspects of a person’s needs are addressed and cared for. It’s a two way street.

Remember that a relationship is a synthesis two individuals; let love, respect and trust be your guide.

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A really big indicator of whether or now a couple can reconcile is what the issue that broke up was about. Are you aware of the true reasons why you split? Chances are that there were some needs that were not being met. If you don’t know why, try to find out. The making up process always starts with precise, clear and honest communication.

Were there financial troubles? Infidelity? Illness? Who was dissatisfied? These questions help guide you towards the issues that need to be addressed in order for your relationship to move forward. Often times relationships can be saved with willingness to compromise, understanding and plenty of honest discussion.

A common issue in split relationships is infidelity. How you approach this matter depends on whether you were the unfaithful one or not.

If you were the transgressor, take some time to figure out what it was you were after while you were being unfaithful. Is monogamy really for you? If you decide that your moment of cheating was a fluke, realize that you’ve already broken her trust and there is really no going back from that point. What this means is that you must dedicate yourself to rebuilding this trust and this may take time. Your relationship will not return to the way things were before you cheated and in fact may change significantly to be either better or worse. Do not make this decision lightheartedly.

Something else to think about: sometimes previous cheaters become suspicious, overtly jealous or envious and begin to obsess over whether the partner they cheated on will cheat on them. If this happens, remember that this is your insecurity making itself known and think about going to counseling on your own or as a couple.

If she was the transgressor, she must go through a similar process. The way she responds to such self-inquiry will decide plenty. If this stint of infidelity was her first offense and you consider her apology sincere, then trying to move forward and past her infidelity is definitely possible, but it will take time and work. Your own emotions will need time to heal and adjust and in time, you may begin to trust her again. However, there is only one second chance. Serial cheaters should not be tolerated by anyone.

Finances are another major reason couples spit. If you’re living together, the issue of who pays what and how much is spent overall can cause some tension between couples. How you deal with this tension will have to be based on the lifestyles you both lead. Is it feasible for both of you to put in equal amounts of money and split everything in half? Usually, one half of the party will earn more than the other, in which case it might be helpful to remember that each party can truly only give based on ability, and each deserves as much based on their need.

That kind of thinking is good for other issues such as emotional and sexual needs. Were you two compatible in those areas? If you were not aware of problems, could it be that there was bad communication involved? Give each other space to figure out what it is you each truly need. Open communication is the key towards any kind of reconciliation.

All relationships go through rough patches, this may not be the end of yours. Remember to give each other love, respect and trust.

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